ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
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