...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
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