just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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