oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
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