Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
Randomize
