Eric just called. Says he's trapped in a cul de sac because the road disappeared. Wants me to tell him what street has the bushes that whisper sweet nothings into you ear and the wobbling purple pokemon. Oh, and a "bigger and better" penis is growing out of his belly button. He took shrooms by the way.
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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