It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
40s are totally the cure
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize