shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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