THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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