grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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