So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
