that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
