Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
