p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Randomize
