Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Randomize
