i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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