If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Randomize
