Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Randomize
