And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
