So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
This toilet bowl is my home.
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