i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Randomize
