It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Randomize
