i need an iv and a liver transplant
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
