Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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