so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize