K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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