dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
