I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Randomize