talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize
