Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
