just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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