my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
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