I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
40s are totally the cure
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
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