If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Randomize
