my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
