I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I'm sobbing to NWA
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Randomize
