belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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