He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
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