Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
