is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
