It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
It's rum buckets o'clock
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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