Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Randomize
