Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
