Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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