In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
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