why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
