On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Randomize
