is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize
