Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
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