Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
